NSFW Sunday Wants Lesbian Friends With Positive | Autostraddle

[
presented image via maurizio di iorio
]

Obviously it’s just
“not that simple” for males and ladies to be “friends with advantages” or perhaps to have “no strings connected
.” This notion is a hot topic nowadays, as a result of nation’s exhilaration relating to “No Strings With Advantages,” the remake of the Natalie Portman/Ashton Kutcher initial from previously this current year, this time around featuring Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake.

But what about lesbians?

Once upon a time I’d a habit of having into these circumstances with “right ladies” — the lack of strings was actually implicit for the commitment because certainly a straight girl wasn’t seeking a commitment with a girl. Particularly if she currently had a boyfriend. Most of the drama, all sex, and nothing of this dedication! It really is magical/excruciating.

Although I caution against seeking or
slipping in love with
or
confessing the love for a direct lady
and also never ever done this my self, right women are great enjoyable as friends-with-benefits as long as you are able to keep your feelings contained in a secure small box. “In your box office,” as they say.

But
buddies with advantages between two real-live lesbian ladies
or perhaps you learn, bisexual or elsewhere interested-in-ladies females? Numerous report that it’s as well hard because females have actually most emotions, but it is already been known to occur. It’s possible. Sometimes two girls simply wanna enjoy! (the same as
Whitney Mixter
)

But, in an article which requires practical question “why can there be no feminine type of grindr?”,
WildCherry argues
:

“Usually homosexual males decide to try everyday gender like a duck to liquid. Straights keep their into the informal sex stakes but behind-the-scenes it’s very usually men driving these encounters. When it is kept around 2 females, circumstances come to be less feverish.”

At Examiner.com,
The Lesbian union Writer has many advice about getting buddies with benefits
, like “whenever you are over her demand for that end up being faithful or phone the lady regularly, only saying “I said i did not desire such a thing major,” doesn’t you off the hook.”

Ashley at Diffuse5.com
likewise has some suggestions
from a lesbian point of view but even more important, Dara Nai at AfterEllen finds an easy way to discuss intercourse on AfterEllen together review of

Friends With Benefits

titled
We-all Want Friends With Benefits
:

”

Buddies with Advantages goes whenever Harry Met Sally one much better. Versus inquiring whether women and men is simply friends, it assumes they’re able to nowadays. Issue in 2011 is: Can buddies have intercourse and never fall-in love, or even worse, screw up the friendship? Well, sh-t howdy, lesbians are asking our selves that for a long time.”

In Sep 2009,
The fresh York instances published articles called “exactly what do Females wish”
regarding what turns women on, focusing in the beginning on a report of female need executed by respected scientist Meredith Chivers. She performed experiments which involved seeing several types of porn, and discovered that although men reacted genitally in “category specific” steps (right men like straight porn, an such like) that:

“Whatever their own self-proclaimed intimate positioning, [women] revealed, on the whole, powerful and quick penile arousal when the screen provided guys with men, females with females and females with guys.”

Furthermore, with regards to involved discrepencies between the subject matter’s reported arousal (that they typed about) and their real arousal (which had been calculated by elegant scientific materials connected to different important parts of the body):

“…with the ladies, particularly the directly women, mind and genitals appeared barely to participate in exactly the same person. The readings from plethysmograph while the keypad just weren’t in a lot accord. During shots of lesbian coupling, heterosexual females reported much less enjoyment than their unique vaginas indicated; enjoying gay men, they reported much less; and seeing heterosexual sexual intercourse, they reported much more. Among the lesbian volunteers, the 2 indication converged when women made an appearance on display. But when the flicks included merely males, the lesbians reported significantly less engagement than the plethysmograph recorded.”

Your whole post is actually fascianting, in reality, nevertheless primary part is these studies could “move how women see their own capacity to get turned on.” Or not:

“…sometimes Chivers talked just as if the actual forest wasn’t apparent whatsoever, just as if their difficulties had been an illustration a reduced amount of inherent intricacy than of societal efforts to modify female eros, of social limitations which have left ladies lust dampened, distorted, inaccessible to understanding. “A lot of societies have quite rigid requirements regulating female sexuality,” she stated. “if it sex is relatively passive, after that precisely why many regulations to control it? Exactly why is it very terrifying?” There is the implication, inside her words, that she might never ever illuminate her subject because she would never actually see it, your information she and her colleagues accumulate might-be misleading, might express just the creations of culture, and that her interpretations might-be top away from fundamental truth. There seemed to be the intimation that, at their center, women’s sex may not be passive at all. There was ability your very long history of anxiety could have hidden the type of women’s lust also significantly to unearth, to review.”

Time while on the lookout for backlinks on this subject I ended up only at that syllabus for a course labeled as
College or university Sex & Philosophy: Pals with Benefits
and in some way following that ended up about list of
Get Ask Alice
guidance questions relating to LGBTQ issues and that I think you’d like that also. It really is like we are taking a journey online together.

Finally, some other person thinks
pals with advantages is actually medically impossible
, but from the things I browse from it, i believe this some one is very inaccurate.

SWEET TUMBLR ALERT:

Freckled

:
Dedicated to your passion for freckled women
.

CUTE PHOTOGRAPHER ALERT FROM CHD-WCK.COM:

CHD-WK!
: In Her Own Own Surface

Disclaimer:


All of the photos on NSFW Sundays tend to be obtained from various tumblrs nor belong to all of us. All are connected and credited on best of the abilities in hopes of attracting extra traffic with the tumblrs and photographers that have blessed all of us with this imagery. The inclusion of a photograph here really should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual direction. If you have a photo included here that is assigned to you and you would like it eliminated, please email our very own technology director at cee [at] autostraddle mark com and it’ll be eliminated quickly, no questions asked.